Caitlynn's Journal: A Harry Styles Fanfiction
by smile-with0me
Summary: This is my journal. I can't believe my brother quit smoking and is trying to quit drinking. I hate my brother's friend, he's the one that-never mind. I can't say it. But I met Harry, Louis, Niall, Liam and Zayn! I can't believe this happened. Not very good for a fanfic, just random stuff.
1. Chapter 1

Well, I guess this is it. I hate writing about my life, but before my Aunt passed away, I promised her that I'd write something about my life. I feel so stupid! Alright, well… My name is Caitlynn Stahrz. Yes, it is pronounced like stars. I am 17 years old. My parents are both dead, and I have an older brother. He's completely mad, bonkers even. He's the only family I've got, but he drinks too much. It hurts me to see him like that.

One of his best friends, Mark, raped me last summer. I can't believe I can actually tell "someone" that. Buy never-mind. Every time my brother invites him over, I go straight to my room, lock the door, and start crying. I won't even come out for a wee when he's here. I can't believe my brother doesn't even know what's going on.

But let's go a different way. Not a depressing way….

"Jordan, get your butt up here, now!" I yelled at my brother. "What?" He came downstairs, with a girl. She might as well as not have anything on, only a thong and a bra. "You promised you would-"He completely ignored me, kissing the girl-everywhere he possibly could. "Miss," I said in the cutest voice I could, trying not to be sarcastic "leave, now."

She glared at me, kissed my brother, and then slammed the door on the way out. "What the heck was that for? She won't ever speak to me again!" I started to pick up his mess on the counter "good," but he groaned "you are the worst sister ever!" He stormed upstairs, and slammed his room shut.

I dropped the things in my hand, ran over to the couch, put a pillow over my head, and started to cry. A few hours later, I felt someone sit on the couch, "I'm sorry. I really didn't mean to say that. I was just upset." I took the pillow off my face "yes, you did." I hugged him "but I forgive you."

"Thank you."

"You're welcome."

OH! And another thing before I stop writing, I went to Starbucks today, as I do every day, and I met someone. Well, should I say I bumped-erm-he bumped into me. He had the most beautiful green eyes ever. I could go on and on about him forever.

As I walked out of Starbucks, with a latte in my hand, and all of a sudden HE walks straight into me. I spilled all of it down my shirt, and I lost my cookie too.

"What is your problem? You should look where you're going. I mean, seriously. You could have broken my knee, instead of my drink!" I finally looked up into his eyes, and that's when I…

I'll just leave you with that. I'm being called away, by someone special. Wish me luck!


	2. Chapter 2

Let me see… oh yes. After all of that crap, we hung out for a while then went our separate ways…

"Hey, I'm home!" I saw my brother, sitting on the couch, waiting for me "it's late. You, bed, now. I was worried about you."

"It's only 7:56. Calm down. "I was walking up the steps "I'm just surprised you aren't drunk half to death."

"Excuse me?" I heard him say, and then I ran upstairs.

Alright, so much fun huh? But let's go on with today. It just so happens to be 9:35 pm, and today, my brother and I went shopping….

"Let's go in here".

"Noooooo! Not in there. No more girl stores. Please." I stopped, backed up a little bit, and saw five handsome men. Two, of which, were Louis, and Harry. "Alright, let's go this way." Jordan looked back at what-or who I was looking at "what? You go to school with those guys, and you're embarrassed to be seen with me?"

"No! No, I don't go to school with them, and I just don't feel like talking to them, just yet."

I didn't see them for about half an hour though. "Hey, let's eat here. Are you alright with that? Jordan?"

"Yeah, I'm cool with that."

About five minutes into us eating-well, scarfing the food down, I heard someone.

"Hello, love? What are you doing about?" I smiled. Louis. I turned around "just hanging around".

"Who's this, your boyfriend or something?" I smiled, but then realized what he said. I liked the fact he sounded jealous, but the fact of my brother being my boyfriend is just disgusting. "No, Jordan is NOT my boyfriend. He is my BROTHER."

"Oh."

"So, are you going to introduce me to your friends?"

"Harry, is this the beautiful girl you were going on and on about?"

Harry and I blushed "No! No, I-I did not."

"Anyway, this is Niall, Zayn, and Liam."

"It's very nice to meet you."

"It's nice to meet you too."

After all of that, we all talked and my brother went home early- wanted some beer- and guess what? They invited me over to their house tomorrow! Oh, I'll be right back; my brother is calling me away.

Kill me. My BROTHER just invited Mark over, and he may possibly spend the night. He is supposed to come over at exactly 7 am. I can't go over to their house. Not tomorrow. Not tomorrow.


	3. Chapter 3

Well, doomsday has arrived. It is 7:50 am, and the monster is already here. I'm locking my door, and hiding out. I swear I will move out if he comes over too often. I can't stand to see him- that boy- anywhere. But let's go through this morning at exactly 7 am…

"Caitlynn, can you come down here for a moment?" I put a shirt on; I was wearing a bra, no under-shirt, nothing, and came downstairs. "What's up?" I looked into the eyes, of the monster. "You remember Mark right? Just thought if you came downstairs, I didn't want you to be surprised, like coming down with nothing on…"

I didn't let him finish. I saw the look in Mark's eyes, and ran upstairs. I locked my room, and I am hiding out. I haven't eaten all day, and it is… 8:01 now. And I really have to pee. I can't hold it in.

I am literally crying. The ink is going down now, I can barely write.

As I went to the bathroom- or well, came out of the bathroom, walking up the stairs, was, Mark. "Hey babyh, I haven't seen your pretty little face in a while." I pulled away, his hand fell to his side, and I tried to run back to my room.

Big mistake. He grabbed my wrist and whispered "want to have some fun?" I tried to push him off of me, but I was not strong enough. I never am. After he was finished with me, he whispered "you dare tell your brother, I'll kill you."

So now I can't do anything. My arms hurt, I feel like I have a bruise on my face, but I don't. I feel like dying. I wish I could die. I have no reason to live. Nobody loves me, and I can't tell anyone anything that has happened. I don't have any friends, and even if I did, I wouldn't even know how to start.

And it's only 1:12 pm. I still have hours to go.


	4. Chapter 4

It's been a few days since that monster has left, and I have news. I. Am. Pregnant. **Pregnant! ** At 17 years old. And the problem is: I can't tell my brother, because he would ask me who got me pregnant. The other thing; I can't tell Mark that I'm pregnant, but I don't believe in abortion. I can't have a baby at 17, unless I leave town. That's my only option. I can't see Jordan or the guys.

I'll leave, right now. I'll leave him a note. (He's out with the monster at the moment, won't be home all day. (It's 7:45 right now)) . Better get packing! But first, I've got to find a new town. I haven't seen or heard from the guys lately. I gave them my number, but, nothing. They haven't even called to see why I didn't come over. (They also gave me their addresses.)

So I am on a plane right now, I left my brother a note giving a little explanation on why I left, and the guys numbers and addresses so I won't have to explain to them why I left either. I don't even know if you can understand me, I am such a mess right now. Hopefully you can. Wait, why am I writing that down? I'm talking to a journal. Not an actual person.

I am officially at my new home, in a new town. But I'm not saying what town, ugh I keep forgetting, nobody is reading this! Tell me, tell me if you are! See, my point exactly. But, anyways, I have a new job. It's a nice job, but it doesn't pay well. So when I have the kid, I'll have to take on more and more jobs.

I'm done! My room is officially made. Bed's set, laptop over here, books over there, etc. etc.

Oh, wait, I forgot. My brother called me and left a voicemail. Well no duh I didn't answer him. I'm not stupid. I wrote I wasn't going to see him again, at least, for a long time, and I really thought it would be easier to just make it like he didn't exist. But he does. Anyway, here's what he said…

"Caitlynn, why did you leave? Did I do something wrong? I stopped-well, almost stopped- drinking and I did quit smoking. If I did anything wrong, please, just tell me. Come back to me. I miss you. We're really close. If I did anything to offend you, I'm really, really sorry."

After that, my brother called me two more times. On the third one, I answered, just so he'd stop. Here…

"Hello? Jordan?" He gasped "Caitlynn?" After that, he started mumbling things "why did you leave?"

"I wish I could tell you. I really do. But I-I just can't." We talked some more, and he said he'd call the guys, tell them I left. (If I did I'd probably start crying).

"Well, it's time for bed. Say good-night little baby. Everything will be alright." I whispered "everything will be alright". I love you. I really, really do.


	5. Chapter 5 Rough Draft

Ugh, I don't know how to write today. I'll edit this tomorrow, when my head is straight. But I can't get behind on my writing.

So, I started my job today. I swear the guy working with me was flirting. He was just going on and on, mumbling like heck, trying to make me smile. It was sweet, but also extremely annoying after a while. I mean, come on, after all, you have work to do, get to it. Ugh, I haven't eaten, it's two am, and I am just draw-writing now. I should be asleep, but I can't. I just can't. Writing is a part of my life now. I feel incomplete without it.

Doesn't make sense, does it?

Anyways, I'm watching the Avengers right now, and I'm just talking to my bundle of joy in my tummy. I'm thinking of naming her Ariel Marie or Scarlett… maybe even Belle.

I haven't spoken to any of the guys, but last time I spoke to my brother, he said that Harry was really sad, or depressed. It's really sweet that harry would become sad over my absence. My brother wants me to call them, meet up with them, video-chat, whatever, but get in touch with them. I'm thinking about doing so, but I just don't want to answer the question of _why _I left. Should I? No. But, maybe, I will. Who knows of what tomorrow brings?

Alright, I've made up my mind. I'll contact them, but avoid any questions on where I am, or why I left. Alright, so it is almost 1 am. 25 minutes til'. Ugh, I have to work tomorrow. I think.

Whatever, I'll just get some rest, and hopefully I can re-write this tomorrow on another page! It's easier this way.

'And he didn't invite me'. Iron Man in the Avengers. I'll just leave you with that. Not really much of a good thing, huh? (:


	6. Chapter 5 official

SO, I've been messaging the guys, and they've asked me to do a live chat with them. At first, I was going to say no, but, I really wanted to see their faces. "Caitlynn? Heh I can't believe it. I haven't heard from you in forever."

"It's nice to hear your voice too, sweetie." I smiled and giggled.

"I wish I could see you in person. Tell me where you are, please I want to see you face to face. Not just on the internet."

I hesitated, but… "Yes! NO. But, yes. I mean, no." I sighed "alright, I guess you can come."

"Can I bring Louis? He's been pushing me to find out where you were, or just try to make contact with you."

He looked at my face "No! No, I don't mean it like that. I just meant-"

"I know what you mean. Yes, he can come."

I went to the airport the next day, to see where they were, and I saw Harry. "CAITLYNN!" He ran up to hug me- "I can't believe you're here." I whispered. "Me neither."

"I've missed you, boo." I said to Louis after he found us. "I've missed you too."

"Want to go out for dinner later, after we put your bags in my apartment?"

"Mmmmm it's great, right? It's my favorute place since I've been here."

"It IS pretty good." All of a sudden, it was an awkward silence….

"I'm….. Going to the bathroom." Harry and Louis smiled "hurry back."

"Louis," I stopped, hid behind the wall " what's the matter with you? Why are you giving Caity the cold shoulder?"

Louis whispered and leaned his head closer to Harry "she is emotional, puffy, she's getting bigger, Harry, don't you see? She's pregnant!"

"No, she can't be. She's way to innocent. And, it doesn't give you the right to give her the could shoulder."

"Look, I don't think we should hang out with her anymore. It wouldn't be good for any of us. Especially you."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"I liked her too, but she would make it seem like you got her pregnant. No socializing with her for you after we get back."

"No, Louis, she _can't_ be pregnant. I-I'll just ask her."

I couldn't take it any longer, so I just busted out "I think you should leave. Anyone who thinks I could be a problem for them-I just don't want to have any contact with you." I started to tear up.

"Caity, wait. Did you hear what he said?"

"Yes I heard what he said! Why else do you think I would say something like that? Come on, I mean, seriously."

"So, you _aren't _pregnant?"

I put my hands up "I AM. I am pregnant. That's why I left."

"Why couldn't you have told us? I wouldn't have-"

"I thought you would have done exactly what Louis did. Which, he just did EXACTALY what I thought."

"But I'm not like that. Come back, please."

"I'm sorry, but I can't. I don't want someone- who got me this way- to see me like this. I haven't even told him yet."

"Harry, let's just-"

"Louis, just stop, alright? I love you like a brother, but you can't treat someone I like, like this. I thought you were better than that. Seriously, I may love her."

My week has just begun. Harry stood up for me against his friend, and he knows I am pregnant. He also said- you know what? It doesn't even matter. And I think I just might love him, too.

"Kisses, sweet Mindy, you'll meet me soon." Only a few months to go!


End file.
